Appearance Alert!
MRC President Brent Bozell on FNC's The Kelly File at 9:15 p.m. ET

Modern Family: Do You, Boo

Modern Family logoBe you.

That's all. Thanks for the click. I'll catch ya next week.

If only... sigh

Honestly though, that's how I'd summarize this episode: be you.

How do you bond with your grandson? Just lift some weights and help him build something. Be you.

How do you accept your flower girl wearing a Halloween costume? Understand that propriety and tradition don't matter. Especially if you are gay and want to get married*. Who are you to force someone into your way of thinking? Be you.

How does a super nice guy impress a girl? Thoughtful, romantic gestures. The bigger the better. Be you.

How do culture snobs get along with each other socially? Faking it. Totally faking it. Because culture snobs are the worst. If you are a culture snob, don't be you. You stink. That band that has 100 downloads on iTunes isn't the best thing since sliced bread. You aren't cool for being into them and acting like you are the coolest because you know who they are just shows how much of a douchenozzle you are.

(N.B. This applies to foodies, art lovers, travelers, and anybody else who thinks they are elite because they have a niche focus that they specialize in.)

*Are we as a society totally redefining marriage? Is that a thing now? We are forgetting the whole marriage has ALWAYS been between men and women thing? We are okay with this insanity? Awesome!